Five times she fell in love with the sun
by peppermintss
Summary: The sun would always die, so that the moon could live to see another night. Yet, that does not mean it was the moon's wish.


**i.**

His _**smile**_ was almost blinding in its radiance; for his time was so troubled, yet he still stood out like a ray of sunlight in their sorrowful community – even if _she_ was the only one to see it at first. The way those lips would crack in the smallest of ways and how his eyes would become sparkling blue like the glittering ocean when he was telling her of Zanarkand, was enough to bring a new warmth to her heart. His joy was infectious, and she too found her own smiles to be more _real_ when he was around.

 **ii.**

His passion for victory, his unyielding drive to push himself as far as he could was admirable. Inspiring even. It sent a tingle through her bones that had felt aged far beyond their years; he brought her to life in the dreariest of moments, reminding her that she was still so young and that it was ok to laugh ( to **actually** laugh as if her end wasn't approaching ever closer with each passing day ). He made her feel like …. a kid, a kid she never got to be and brought out a side of her she had not known since she was a small child. Her heart beat faster that day, but in a rhythm that only he could make.

 **iii.**

Her soul felt broken when he told her that he knew the truth – she wouldn't survive at the end. Her life was never meant to be long and she had chosen her path, yet the sorrowful smile that never belong on _**his**_ face, was the first and _only_ thing to make her think that _maybe_ she should abandon it all. Within the crystal clear water of Macalania forest where she had stood for the past hour ( clothes more than soaked and skin pruned worse than a raisin ), she dreamed of a different life; a life where she threw everything away and was selfish for **once** – selfish with _him_. She didn't though, she _couldn't_. She always knew, but it was his soft reminders of his Zanarakand and the way the sky changed color as the sun rose that her heart fluttered to a different ( and unbroken ) beat still. He was always the one to keep her alive.

 **iv.**

The _kiss_ was inevitable, something they've danced around doing for some time, but finally with her tear stained face and pruned skin she would kiss him back with as much feeling as he was pouring to her. It wasn't life changing, nor did it speak of _fireworks_ and heat – both were inexperienced ( though **she** more than _he_ ) and it was clumsy, but it was warm and gentle, and above all … _loving_. It was as if his affection surrounded her, enveloping her away from the cold and tragedy her life had been surrounded by ( would _continue_ to be surrounded by ), replacing it with a childlike compassion and adoration she had never felt from any one person before. It was exhilarating and _joyful_. Her heart felt as though it were going to burst that day … something she would have no problem with if this were to be the last feeling she knew.

 **v.**

The end was always going to come, no matter how often she hoped the journey would never truly conclude. Yet, she had never imagined that she would be _alive_ and breathing to see it, but they had done it – Sin was gone and with it, Yu Yevon. This moment should have been happy, but her heart was heavy with sorrow as he spoke of _needing to leave_ , that his **time was up**. She wanted to scream and cry on that deck, to beg him to stay, to beg to any deity that would listen to her plea so that she wouldn't have to lose one more person in her life. They didn't though, and he was still going to leave ( it was _unfair_ ), but she wasn't going to let him go so easily. She wanted to latch onto him, but the cold steel of the deck is what met her. It was then she realized, they had altered the path of the _summoner_ , a life was always meant to be given and if not _hers_ then … the one who the Fayth had sent on this journey by her side must take her place. At least, that's what she _wanted_ to think, because somehow it was a bit easier to swallow ( though it _**never**_ will be ). She thanks him, for giving her a life and emotions she never thought to feel, for giving her a life that she was ready to throw away – after all he kept his promise, she _didn't_ die. It was the very last moment where he hugged her before running off the edge, that she knew.

The sun had stolen her heart. She didn't want it back. It was _his_.

It was **always** his.


End file.
